Outrage

I want to take a moment to express my outrage that many people didn’t believe the women who came forward about Bill Cosby until he said things that implied he did, in fact, rape those women.

I want to take a moment to express my outrage that the instant Caitlyn Jenner appeared on the front of a magazine, the media instantly switched into the rhetoric always used on women. She’s not in her twenties, and she appeared in a pretty one-piece/corset-y thing. Oh the horror. Oh I forgot, she also has a few wrinkles and wasn’t 100% airbrushed. How dare she appear her age and also look fab.

I want to take a moment to express my outrage that I have to, after trying to express these feelings myself, get my fiancé to stand up for me sometimes… because my voice just isn’t enough. Thank goodness he listens. Thank goodness he doesn’t speak for me unless I ask him to.

I want to take a moment to express my outrage that marines were killed last week, on U.S. soil, and there is still no real implication that gun laws will change.

I want to take a moment to express my outrage that marines were killed last week by a man with a name in a different language, and that means he is clearly a bad guy in the media. If he had had an english name, I wonder how the media representation would be different. (Note: I have not done much research into this situation, so please take these words at face value and do not say that I am in support of murderers because I believe that everyone should be represented equally in the media.)

I want to take a moment to express my outrage that I had to write that note in my defense, because people these days are so quick to declare others anti-American, freedom haters, or extremists.

I want to express my outrage that relations between the U.S. and Cuba have changed, I believe for the better, and after so many years of no real diplomatic relations… no one seems to be paying attention to the fact that things just changed. I can find things in the news, on facebook, on twitter, about what celebrity wore what dress last weekend, but I have to actually look hard for a tidbit about Cuba. That’s backwards.

I want to express my outrage that, as a twenty-something woman, I get more well wishes because I am recently engaged than I did when I was accepted into graduate school. They are equally life-altering. They are in my eyes equally important. And as happy as I am to graciously and happily, with a big goofy smile, accept congratulations on my engagement… why is an impending marriage more important than the education required to create a career? Is my worth so very tied up in whether or not I am attached to someone? How might this congratulational (new word, made it up just now) imbalance be different if I were gay? Would my worth be tied up in my relationship status if I were permanently attaching myself to another woman?

I want to express my outrage that I have so much frustration. It’s exhausting. It’s like shouting at a piece of concrete. It’s like trying to mold water. It feels like no matter how many people try and change things for the better, they never change.

They will change some day. I hope I live to see it.

Being a grown up

Growing up is weird.

When you’re little your parents clearly know everything. They’re never scared, they have all the answers, and know how to untie those knots you accidentally made in you shoe laces. When you have a nightmare, Dad gets next to you in bed and rubs your back until you fall back asleep. When you’re sick Mum stays up with you while you’re crying because your ear hurts. They are the end all be all of the world.

Then you get a little older. You realize that sometimes when Mum gets angry it’s really because she’s sad and scared. You realize that Dad doesn’t actually know everything, because he helped you get the wrong answer on your homework. Despite these imperfections, they are still incredible to you. You know that they still can take care of you.

And then you’ve graduated college, you don’t live with them anymore, and you have your own experiences and content knowledge. You can see them age, them and your grandparents, and you can help them with things that you never dreamed of. You can be a productive part of conversations, even providing answers for them. And all the while you can’t figure out why it all feels so weird. Something feels off. And then you realize…

It’s because suddenly they’re not the magical heroes they used to be. You’ve figured out the secret to adulthood, the secret they kept from you as long as they could: being a grown up doesn’t mean you’re never scared and know everything. It actually means being scared and not knowing a lot, but carrying on anyway.

Being a grown up is overrated.

Feminist Fatigue

rockstar dinosaur pirate princess

atentdeadYou may have noticed that blogday has been missing for a couple of weeks. I have no excuse for this – I wasn’t moving house (thank goodness – I’ve already done that 5 times since starting this blog) or on holiday or ill or anything special at all.  Well, I had a few exams and was prioritising revision, but if I am brutally honest with myself the revision was a blessed excuse not to write.

I didn’t write because…I had nothing to say.

Not that there wasn’t anything going on in the world that I could have written about, or that nothing made me angry, or that nothing happened, or either that I didn’t have any ideas to write about. I just couldn’t get my brain in the right space to sit down and write. It all felt too huge, too complicated, too pointless, too much of a struggle. With…

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Repeat after me: Athleticism is beauty. Athleticism is beauty. Athleticism is beauty. Athleticism is beauty…

Fit Is a Feminist Issue

Serena Williams, one of the greatest tennis players of all time, just won the women’s singles title at Wimbledon.

Again.

For the sixth time, actually.

That’s like, five times. And then again. For a total of six times.

six

Serena Williams is one of the great athletes of our time, and one of the greatest tennis players ever. But alongside the story of her win, what else does the New York Times– the paper of record—see fit to print? This story.

In this story ,“Tennis’s Top Women Balance Body Image with Ambition”, many of the world’s top women players interviewed said, in effect, that having the muscular world-class athletic bodies they have makes them feel “unfeminine”, as 14th-ranked Andrea Petkovic said.

“People say, ‘Oh, you’re so skinny, I always thought you were huge,’ ” she said. “And then I feel like there are 80 million people in Germany who…

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I’m back!

Hello world. I’m back.

We came back from Halifax, Nova Scotia, on Wednesday. After two weeks of rehearsals, performing, and ogling the Paris Police Gymnastics Team… I’m just ready to be home. I wouldn’t trade the experiences I had over the last couple weeks for the world, but gosh being away from home just for a two week vacation is hard. Being away from home for two weeks to be in a show is a million times harder.

I’m not really sure what to say about what happened during our time in Halifax. It was fabulous, it was long, it was hard. There were tears, and laughter, and sunshine, and rain. We went on adventures, we climbed very steep hills, we put our feet in the freezing cold harbor. We looked out over the city on top of the Citadel, we ate in pubs, we danced, and we gave our show everything we had.

Oh, and Adam and I got engaged!!!!!

So really, it was a great trip. Now we are home, I’m nursing the ends of a sleep-deprivation cold, and have to catch up on real life. The to-do list includes finishing unpacking, cleaning the apartment, and finding myself a place volunteering at a museum. But, for now, here are some pictures from our trip!!!

While we were away the Supreme Court ruled marriage bans unconstitutional!

My first very pretty design on a latte…. and it’s even just from Starbucks!

Hanging with some friends watching other groups rehearse at the arena.

Every Sunday needs chocolate cake!

Selfies in full kit are, of course, necessary.

Adam falls asleep pretty much anywhere he can

The sister came to see us!

On top of the Citadel, she’s so pretty.

Sister turned into the paparazzi when we told her we were engaged. Most of the pictures were iffy, but I just love this one at the top of the Citadel looking out over the world.

Mum came to see us too!!

The waves come in pretty hard on McNabs Island in Halifax Harbor.

Mum wanted a picture with Adam too.

My swollen and aching feet in the harbor. The water was so cold it was like icing!

A beautiful view off of McNabs Island!